Seeing nothing but Red Read online

  SEEING NOTHING BUT RED

  Jazzmine Mellodi Thomas

  Copyright©2020 by Jazzmine Thomas

  Cover Design : Jazzmine Thomas

  All Rights Reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any way, shape or form without written permission from the Author. However brief quotations embodied within reviews or articles are encouraged.

  This book is completely fiction and all characters, names and places are created by the Author. Some sensitive topics are highlighted in this book.

  Readers, Enjoy.

  This book is dedicated to all of you that have supported me through this journey.

  To my favorite one, Thankyou for believing in me more than i believe in myself, for the continuous support and also pushing me to finish this book. The famous " well, whats stopping you?" was the kick up the butt i needed.

  Jackson.

  It was yet again another dreary day at the hotel. I have lost count of the amount of times I had shouted at my staff and it wasn't even ten am. I find it unbelievable that at one of the busiest times of the year for the hotel i am still catching staff deciding it is perfectly acceptable for them to sit around talking on their phones. Last time i checked under the job description when they applied it didn't mention me paying for their social lives.

  It’s often at times like this i sit and contemplate whether running this hotel is worth the stress , but that thought usually loses any logical reasoning about 5 seconds later when i remember my mum's smile. She breathed this place, she started it when the walls had seen better days , the hotel had the worst reputation, rooms were cheap and the saying you get what you paid for often left my mother's mouth followed by a glint in her eye because she knew , she knew she had a dream which she was hell bent on seeing through. I’ve never seen so much passion pour out of one's soul.

  It took my mum about 4 years to convert what was once the cheapest last resort hotel in the town to one which had a competitive rate and was mildly busy half of the year. Money was a struggle for my mother as she had a dream, she was driven and put everything she could into rebuilding this hotel.

  However, her dream was kept on a short leash due to my “father” One of the most controlling assholes , who didn't deserve the smile my mother gave him everyday when she returned from a tough day’s work at the hotel with his supplies.

  Urgh his supplies. Ouch.

  I looked down to realise i had yet again got lost in my thoughts whilst i had been trying to do something important. And, Yes i did just walk into someone's luggage, someone's luggage in a hotel you say? That's not bizarre but yes i tell you it is bizarre when this luggage is right in the doorway of my office. I picked up the bags, contemplating throwing them down the stairs, however that probably wouldn't be my best move seeing as i own this place and if guests saw i'd most likely end up losing ‘the Great Hale Hotel’ reputation. As I passed the luggage to our receptionist Polly with a stern stare , she raised her hands with a half smile and a ‘ please don't fire me i’ll get right on it look’ however my eyes quickly diverted from Polly to the giant clock above her head. Shit. How was it Eleven fifty-eight already. I was late how the hell was i late when it hadn't even been ten o'clock a minute ago.

  April

  This new town was bizarre , it had everything you wanted but not enough of everything. I liked being out and about rather than at home. A shudder crept over me when I thought of “home” leaving a sharp chill across my body. I hated the fact that i couldn't think of home as a warm place filled with love like most people do, how it is in the books, fairy tales, the safe place where you can run and hide when the bad monsters of the world are trying to catch you.

  But what happens when you close the door and realise them big bad monsters in the world are actually behind the door, once you’ve closed it already in your house, hiding behind every corner , every creak and every move you make.

  Where do you go when you don't have a safe place.

  That thought haunted me every day , as although we had moved to different houses my whole life, my monsters had always moved with me leaving no air for me to breath without fear. The only time I would feel okay was when i was sitting in a busy place, drawing or painting, surrounded by people and love. Yes the love may not be being given to me but there was no harm surrounding myself with people who were full of it. It had become a habit of mine since I was 12 years old, when we first started moving after my dad left my mum for another woman.

  We had previously moved into our house in Sunset row it was beautiful, small and angelic. However, as pretty as that house may of looked it can quickly look ugly and twisted once it was filled with a monster. The new house feeling never lasted long, and once I couldn't bare to be at “home” anymore, i would go find somewhere I could safely pass the time.

  It started off as little coffee shops or libraries. But as I got older I found that a hotel was a lovely way to spend my time, it was the perfect place really. Filled with life, families enjoying a nice holiday or couples on a romantic getaway. There was the odd lone businessmen around but they usually were accompanied by a pretty piece on his arm looking to be wined and dined all in the course of a good time. Still whether it was faithful fun or not , who am I to complain. There was still room and rooms filled with love and I was drawn to it like a magnet.

  I liked setting myself up within the hotel restaurants , they never usually bat an eyelid that i wasn't a guest, I assume they see so many different people day in day out who are they to know who's actually staying here. I’d find a good corner table against the wall, I liked to make sure i could scope the room where I sat, it made it easier for me to see everyone an even easier for me to escape.

  It was a Thursday and I was out of the

  house looking for a new place to fill the hours of the day, we had recently moved to a small town in Calabasal called Rye, it was beautiful but rained a lot.

  When I left the house at eight am this morning, it had been blue sky and sunshine, but fifteen minutes into the forty minute walk to the town center the heavens opened and I was what you would call a drowned rat.

  I darted to the first hotel I saw. It was swanky and I wasn't even sure i would get in the door by the state of me, however once I got past the huge oak doorway and landed in the foyer I was completely shocked to find myself quickly being approached by a member of staff, worry immediately broke in and I was tempted to turn around and bolt for the door. I didn't belong in a place like this.

  But to my surprise the slender middle aged man with a charming smile and dressed to impress in a dark blue suit offered to take my coat. I smiled and politely accepted his offer. Did he think i was staying here? To hell with it if he thought it i may as well continue this charade. With unknown confidence I didn't even know I had, I asked “ I was wondering if I may catch some tea and breakfast in your restaurant, I seem to have forgotten the way, may you point me in the right direction please?”

  Did i really just say that. God, why am i doing this, in all my eight years that i have been spending my time in hotels i have never entered one as polished and pristine as this one and now i was trying to act the part? Did i bang my head this morning, loose my right mind of thinking? He placed my coat on a golden coat rack next to the main door and down into my eyes. Shit he knew, i was busted , can you get arrested for this? Is what I'm doing illegal? Rubbing my thumbs on the tips of my fingers nervously he spoke up and said “Oh yes of course, Mrs…. Sorry please excuse my rudeness but i seem to have forgotten your name.” Did he just call me Mrs? Am i wearing a ring? Do i look old enough to be married. Actually i don't want to know the answer to that i fear i have aged more than i would like due to the constant worrying day in , day out.
>
  “Oh um.. Miss Valentine.” I spurted out with much less confidence than before, the question had caught me off guard. I never used my real name before but for some reason I had put my foot in it and just used my real name. But it wouldn't matter as I probably wouldn't be in the area for much long. Not that I didn't want to be here, it was just the way it went.

  Following Mr. Dark blue suit, I took in the hotel, this really was a beautiful place. The ground was marble and polished to perfection. The staff looked perfectly pristine and had the most welcoming smile. I was starting to feel as if i was royalty with this service. We approached a glass door which was beaming with light, he pulled it back and just held the door open, he just looked at me in silence, as if he was waiting for a reaction. Well, what can I say, I feel like rubbing my eyes in disbelief because what I've just walked into is Truly magnificent.

  When i had approached this place i never thought that there would be a room as beautiful as what I had just walked into. Was this even real? Even if it wasn't this just quickly became my favorite place I've ever been and I hadn't even sat down yet. The walls were tall and filled with glass, the ceiling was high and there was these beautiful purple flowers winding and dangling down from the ceiling. I felt as if I was in a big glass dome.

  The sound of the rain pattering against the windows filled the room with such a delicate and comforting sound. I must've looked like a little kid in a sweet shop, bewildered with what choice of sweet to pick. I was simply amazed with the amount of beauty one room could bring. It oozed an essence of peace and intimacy.

  Observing my surroundings I noticed all the tables were spread out amongst the floor all decorated with an array of carefully selected flowers, giving everyone their own private bubble of beauty . The tables were surrounded with upholstered high back chairs and sofas. In delicately mix matched colours, giving it the comfort and coziness but still looking elegant and chic at the same time.

  Mr Dark blue suit turned to me at this point , with a smirk. I wonder if he's seen this look much, I hoped so this room was truly beautiful and I was hopeful that others enjoyed it as much as i had the moment I walked in. He studied my face “ I think my face looked a lot like yours the first time i saw it too, beautiful isn't it?” i nodded afraid i would slip up and say something stupid without thinking again. He proceeded ahead and led me to a table in the corner, as if it was fate. With my back against the wall and my face facing the rest of the room i was happy. “ a waitress will be with you soon to take your order, enjoy your stay Miss Valentine!” He turned and gently strolled out of the room.

  After i ordered a pot of Tea, I Carefully opened my bag, pulled out my sketchbook and pencils and started drawing, Slowly getting lost in my sketch and drowning out the world around me.

  Jackson.

  Swiftly approaching my favorite room in this place, in a fast paced walk, I should really but running right now, i entered the hotels restaurant. To be greeted with a death stare I had the joy of experiencing way too often than I'd like. This death stare was given to me from the woman I have the pleasure of calling my fiance.

  We were meeting with our wedding organiser. Yes, unfortunately I'm getting married.

  I don't know why i needed to be here to be honest and why she was so angry I was only fifteen minutes late, and I wouldn't say a word anyway during the meeting because all Lacey ( my wife to be, I shiver at the thought.. Is that normal?) Anyway yes Lacey only wanted me here to sign the check. She knew what she wanted, she was not shy in expressing that and as long as I went along with everything she said i could have an easier life.

  Once greeting the wedding organiser ,Margo, I slumped into my seat, hoping this didn't last all afternoon because i had much more important things I could be doing with my day today. After drowning out the sound of Lacey's whiney voice my thoughts traveled to my mother. This would of been her favorite room, I created it for her. Whenever i step in here I wish she’d of had the chance to have seen it. My eyes travel to the high ceiling, behind the flowers sprouting from above was the single word that cherished my mom's soul. Feronia, nobody knew it was there but i did and every time I saw it, it gave me hope that she was free. The word meant Goddess of Freedom in Latin. I hoped she was free. Free of pain and suffering.

  As my eyes traveled from the words imprinted on the ceiling, I caught the sight of a woman I hadn't seen before hunched over the table in the far corner. What was she doing? Suspicion rose and i quirked an eyebrow. Unable to work out what she was doing at that table, whilst studying her she began to relaxed back into the chair leaning her head in her small delicate hand and gently sliding a pencil into her hair. She loosely tucked one of her deep red curls behind her ear.

  I wanted her to look up, I wanted to see her face to see if her face was as gorgeous as I was imaging and with that she began to raise her head and.. “ Jackson! Jackson!” a sharp pain dived into my thigh, my eyes darting down to see Lacey's claws inserted into my legs I quickly turned and faced my way towards my soon to be wife. Her shrieky voice continued, “Jackson, Margo here was wondering your thoughts on a joint bachelorette and bachelor party, apparently all the celebs are doing it now and then i wouldn't have to worry about you and you pals hitting the strip club” I could hear the sarcasm in her voice as she mentioned my “pals” as she and I knew that list wasn't very long, and that was all because of her.

  I had no friends really apart from Tommy who had been my best friend since I was 4 years old. Stuck with me through thick and thin and although he was the most annoying bastard you would ever meet he was the most loyal too. That kid stuck by me when I wasn't even sure where I was or what day it was.

  Lacey hated my friendship with him, as she knew how much it meant to me and that he was probably the only one, who could talk me out of this big fucking mistake i was making marrying Lacey Longmoore.

  I don't even know how we started dating, it's like one minute I was living my life , next it had been consumed by another person. I was going through a rough patch, it was right after my mum had gone “missing” , i knew deep down that she wasn't missing but gone and I was mentally in the worst place.

  I was 16 and found myself sitting at a bar instead of sitting in class, with the rest of the kids my age. You're probably thinking 16? At a bar. But yeah i was at a bar, and I got as drunk as a skunk everyday at the same bar for 2 weeks. I think it was two weeks, each day merged into one, i would probably still be there if it hadn’t of been for Tommy. Tommy cut class everyday that I was at the bar, He sat with me, he didn't drink, we didn't talk but he was there. All until he told me I needed a shower and to get my ass out this shit hole and do my mother proud.

  Those words stayed with me, because I realised if my mother was watching me she would see I was repeating what my father did for the whole of my life and all of her hard work was for nothing.

  Amongst getting my shit together, dealing with my mother's sudden death and being the new owner of a hotel ( plus keeping it running). I met little miss Lacy Longmoore. She had a sweet face, and the tongue of the devil which i was yet to meet until it was too late. The first year of our relationship was pretty normal, i wasn't head over heels for Lacey, but she scratched an itch and filled a void in my life. My jaw clenched , none of this, meeting my fiance or our memories brought me any happiness, i never enjoyed thinking about the past with her or the idea of our future. I was beginning to think that it was making me sick because every time it did cross my mind, my palms would get sweaty and I'd feel faint, which was usually followed by a sudden urge to keep breathing as if i was unable. Bolting to my feet, in a tone smooth enough to kill “ Lacey my love, i’ve just remembered i have to talk to Polly about one of our guests arriving late this afternoon, please excuse me. Margo thank you for your time i'm sure you’ll do a great job” bending down and kissing my fiance on her frozen cheek , catching her icy glare, she gritted through her teeth “ okay baby, love you” fluttering her eyes to Margo.

  Inside i laughed because if anyo
ne had heard that they would know as much as I do that nothing that woman said was filled with love.

  As I walked out of the restaurant I turned to my mystery redhead sitting in my hotel however, disappointment met my gaze as all I saw was an empty table and no redhead.

  April.

  Getting lost in my drawing I hadn't even realised the time, until my phone vibrated in my bag , springing me to life and making me feel like a rabbit trapped in headlights. I Froze, knowing the only person who would have text me was the only reason i wasn’t safe. The reason I wasn’t sitting in my own home. The only reason i woke up everyday desperate to run away but unable to.

  Opening my phone i read :

  What the fuck? Where are you? Why aren't you home cooking my dinner?

  I know you like to run around getting your knickers all frilly for the locals but I expect dinner at 5pm. Sharp. You know the consequences if this doesn't happen.

  I will be seeing you soon.

  Quickly shoving my phone in my back pocket, lifting my bag and darting out of the kitchen, luckily swiftly finding a back door exit. I ran , I ran as fast as I could home. Rapidly losing breath and hope, I glanced at my watch. Reading the time of four fifty-three pm and i was about twenty minutes away from home. If i could remember the way that is, it was getting dark and the journey looked a lot different on my way into town than it does returning. Tears pricked my eyes and i smeared them across my cheek. Knowing that what I was about to endure was horrible, I felt a huge weight in my gut telling me to run faster but my feet were growing tired and I had lost all hope. I knew what was coming and the only person i could blame was myself.